L.J. Writes

You know, it's funny. I don't consider myself an atheist, even though I've never had what folks would call a close relationship with God. (Seeing what's happened to Ro, I can't say I'm sorry about that.) But cultural Christianity was a huge part of my upbringing, and part of why despite all my questions and concerns, I've never really managed to leave, even though I haven't been a regular churchgoer in years.

Where I grew up, my church was a social institution. We didn't talk about theology so much; we were mostly focused on keeping everything together--managing childcare for members, fixing their stuff, pooling money to help each other out, having potlucks and bingo nights and choirs. It was a social safety net that tried to make up for where public institutions had failed, and it was a huge boon to my mother and me. I'm not sure she would've been able to keep me if not for the church.

It's that memory and knowledge of what a church can be that's led me to stay, despite all the problems Christianity has. So you've given me words for an experience I didn't have! Even if I'm still not an atheist. (I still think God exists, just as sort of the joy and life force of the universe, not like a human person at all.)

--Mac