Yeah it's a pretty crappy excuse, and I think I'd be angry at him if I didn't know he's overwhelmed with shame about himself. This is just one of many things he thinks is wrong with him. I understand on some level because shame used to be both my solace and my weapon. It was a perverse comfort to convince myself that I was worthless, because if there was something fundamentally wrong with me and I couldn't change, that meant I didn't have to face up to the pain of looking at my life as it really was, and I didn't have to muster the enormous energy needed to change things. I'm glad, to say the least, that I've gotten better.